What A Long Week

And now its the weekend, thank god.

So my recent movie experience has prompted me to finally change my ringtone on my cell phone. It was the Indiana Jones theme song, but since the movie suc-didily-ucked I changed it back to Summertime by Kenny Chesney. Plus the weather has been consistently nice lately so I think it's fitting.

So I'm downstairs watching the Celtics game on the big tv, and the wife is upstairs on the third floor playing Super Mario two on her old Super Nintendo. I love Super Mario Two, but I also love the Celtics. The thing keeping me downstairs (besides my love of basketball of course) the beer and ginger snaps are down here. Can't go wrong there.

No real big plans for the weekend. Its supposed to rain a lot, so we'll probably just hang out around the house. We've got a shower to tile, but besides that a whole lot of nothing which is nice. Hopefully it'll be nice enough out to golf at some point. I just ordered four dozen new golf balls (for the price of one dozen) so I'm ready to give them a whirl.

Have a great weekend!

I Did A Poop...

Was what the small child announced to everyone upon reentering the theater halfway through the movie, or what George Lucas and Steven Spielberg said to each other after watching their final cut of Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? Unfortunately, it's both...

I can't even rationally explain just how bad this movie was. Growing up, I wanted to be Indiana Jones, I wanted to be that guy who taught history and went on all these adventures based around archeology. I remember going to the old Milton movie theater, that's now a coffee shop by the way, with my best friend and his dad to see The Temple of Doom and being scared sh*tless during the movie, but loving every second of it. A couple of weeks ago I rewatched all the Indiana Jones movies on cable, making it the perfect day for me.

So my question is this.. Why? Why George? Why Steven? Why did you have to go and ruin Indiana Jones? Its like George Lucas was saying.. "What you think Howard the Duck was bad? Well I can top that!"

I tolerated your new Star Wars movies George. I sat through all these of those things and thought to myself.. "Ok he's just getting caught up in all the new technology available and disregarding the dialog a bit.. that's ok, it's still Star Wars so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt." Well I was wrong. Those new movies are no where nearly as good as the original three. First he killed Star Wars, now he goes and kills Indiana Jones. I give him my money, and this is how he pays me back. If you can't tell, I'm taking this very personally.

The story line was atrocious. The dialog was deplorable. The action scenes were CGI'd to death and slow. Like everyone was so old in the movie, that when they ran from a dangerous situation, no one could actually run, they just all walked as quickly as they could. Sort of like when the buffet line opens up at the early bird special. I'm really at a loss for words. I just don't understand why after twenty years you would put out this piece of crap. It's not like you guys need the money or anything. You had twenty effing years to come up with something, and this is the best you could do! ***if you don't know the plot and don't want to know it, skip to the next paragraph*** What, did you and Spielberg get stoned one night hanging around ILM and said to yourselves..."hey what if we took Star Wars/Close Encounters of the Third Kind and combined it with Indiana Jones? Wouldn't that be sweet?!?!" NO! That wouldn't be sweet and it wasn't sweet! I really and truly feel like I was ripped off and we only spent $5.75 a piece on the movie. Technically the wife paid so it was free for me, but I still feel like I was robbed!

I wanted to like this movie so badly. We went in with little expectation, mostly because we didn't want to be disappointed. If you've read any critics reviews, many of them actually like the movie, which leads me to believe that they never actually watched it. Maybe they sent an intern and had them write it up. Heck the intern would only be 22-23 years old and really wouldn't know any better, wouldn't know just how good Indiana Jones movies are supposed to be. Maybe the intern thought that Indiana Jones was played by Brendan Frasier, so the movie was supposed to be hokey and bad. I really don't know. All I do know is that I'm a disappointed and angry blogger right now, and I'm taking it out on Mr. Lucas.

I'm putting this movie in the same category as Rocky V. It never happened. I'm just going to erase the past two hours from my memory and forget it ever happened. I was a much happier person before entering the theater at 5:30 this evening. I feel like a part of my childhood died today... maybe we can get Don McClean to write a song about it....

I Am A Six Machine!

So let's see. Memorial Day weekend, a weekend that should be spent outside, at bbq's, hanging out with friends and family. Yeah, we did that, but not enough of it.

Friday was a night spent in. Chinese food and asleep on the couch at 9:30 while watching the Simpsons movie. Exciting stuff huh.

Saturday, this is where the fun begins. We started off the day at Lowes to pick up some more topsoil for the wife's many gardens. Sidestory: So we're at Lowe's starring at all the toilets again, trying to pick one. First I notice that one of the toilets brand name is Plebe. Now if memory serves (Phil, David, Nancy, feel free to correct me) the plebeians were the lower class citizens of ancient Rome, the patricians the upper class. So why would you name your toilet after the lower class. If I'm trying to sell toilets, I'm naming them like Rolls Royce and Microsoft.. you know the best of the best. Anyway, we're standing there joking around trying to decide what to buy and this older couple (we thought in low 60's ended up being low 70's) comes over and starts looking at the toilets too. At one point, the lady leans over towards the wife and makes a joke about the toilets, round versus oblong bowl, etc. I say, I'm used to the round, so that's what I like (being lactose intolerant, I have to take my toilet choosing very seriously) and the gentleman says that he likes the oblong, but the wife likes the round so that's what they always get. So she says, "yeah, he always complains that there's not enough room on the round toilet, and I always tell him to just push "it" down." Umm what? Ahhh this is Lowes lady and that's a little too much information for us! Hilarious and scary all at the same time haha... but I digress...

After we got back, the wife started cleaning the house while I started work on the bathroom. Before I could start painting, the vanity and toilet had to come out. Here's a before picture of the bathroom. Notice the lovely blue walls.. and the lovely blue toilet.. and the lovely blue sink. Someone had a thing for blue I guess. The vanity is just white, maybe 30 years old, which a cheap counter top.

I decided to tackle the vanity first. Thought to myself, how hard could it be, I've done this before. I think it took me an hour and a half to get the stupid thing out. Caulk everywhere, random screws and a p trap from the 1950's (that's just a guess by the way) which had a will to live, it had no interest in coming out. Ooh, and the best part...NO FLOOR UNDERNEATH IT!!! Who does that? And as you can see, the pipes all come out of the floor, not the wall. Oy vey...

Because of the odd nature of the pipes, whomever installed it put a piece of plywood on the bottom. I don't own a reciprocating saw, so I had to resort to every method my infantile brain could muster up. Of course there was banging, then kicking, then swearing, then cutting, then more swearing... I ended up using giant gardening shears to cut out the wood. Hey, whatever works right..

The toilet was another misadventure. There were three issues here. First, we couldn't seem to get all the water out of the tank, so this led to some messiness. Second, the tank had zero interest in becoming disconnected from the intake pipe. And third, the brain surgeon that installed it used a combination of drywall screws and bolts to attach it to the floor. Long story short, I ended up having to break the porcelain around the bottom in order to remove it because the screws were so rusted that I couldn't get them off. I don't even want to talk about how nasty the wax ring was...

After everything was removed and I put up a coat of primer and two coats of paint up, the installing part came. That's the part where the wife is much better than I am. Together, we laid the first 3 tiles, then I went and played nine holes with my uncle and his nephew and the wife went to work tiling away. By the time I got back, she had finished 2/3 of the floor.

The floor on the right are the new tiles. On the left, the old crappy vinyl (its an off white with, of course, blue "grout" lines").
Don't mind the white dots, those are just the spacers. It really looks amazing though. When you see it in person, you'll be as proud as I am of the wife. Really, a fantastic job. I had my calling as a mason, she apparently had hers as a tiler. Tomorrow night after the grout dries, we'll install the toilet and vanity and next weekend we're going to retile the shower. Hopefully that'll go smoother than this weekend.

So I ended up playing golf both Saturday and Sunday, and for some reason I love the number six. Doesn't matter what the hole is, I shoot a six. Although my uncle's nephew gave me some tips (he's an excellent golfer) and I really cut down on my putting strokes. I'm consistently shooting in the high 40's right now (48-49) per nine holes, which for me is leaps and bounds better than I was last year. My goal is to break 90 (over 18 holes) by the end of the summer, which I think I have a very solid shot at doing. The thing with me is, I rush too much. I need to just take my time and follow through. Give me some Ritalin (that's what they give the ADD kids right) and I'll be the Maine Tiger Woods.

So while at Lowe's today, we gave blood. Ended up waiting almost 45 minutes for our turn to come up, but when it was finally our turn, off we went. While there, they take your blood pressure (me: 106 over 60, the wife, 106 over 62. apparently Maine relaxes us) and told us our blood type (me O-, the wife A+. Which means I'm universal and can save anyone. I'm good like that)

Tonight was spent at a family get together bbq at my other uncles house. Always love going over there cuz these are some of the funniest people you'll ever meet. The wife and I keep saying that someday we're going to record all the stories told and write a book...

Game Two

The Celtics just lost. They really had no business winning this game as they really could not make a defensive stop down the stretch and committed too many ticky tack fouls. That being said, the game was played in Boston right? Cuz someone should have informed the refs of this. I feel like all the 50-50 calls went Detroit's way tonight.. Oh and someone needs to let Doc Rivers know that its the playoffs, not the regular season. At the start of the fourth quarter/end of third quarter he had a zero offense lineup in there, and stuck with them until the Pistons were up by 12. Unacceptable. It's the playoffs, no one is tired at this point, play your best players, run an nine man rotation and that's it. This is not the time to make sure everyone gets to play, their bruised ego's can heal over the summer...
On to game three, Saturday, in Detroit...

The End of New TV

This time of year really stinks. Ninety percent of the network tv shows seasons have concluded, so there's really nothing on tv. A couple of shows, LOST for example, still have yet to have their season finales, but for the most part, everything is over and done with. I guess I could pick up a book or something (I'm currently reading The Future of Freedom and rereading A Walk In The Woods, I'm a huge Bill Bryson fan), but you all know how much I love tv so that's not really a suitable replacement. The summer is usually full of reality tv (which I'm not really a huge fan of) so I'm not exactly holding my breathe for new good shows. I guess it's ok though, as it'll force me to spend more time outside which is always a good thing.

I would just like to thank the wife, once again, for putting up with my Celtics obsession. Yet another night where she has conceded the tv to me. I know I'll pay for it somewhere down the line though.

So the wife shot me an email today because she couldn't think of my most recent catch phrase I've been using to insult people. I immediately gave it to her (dirty pirate hooker) and felt all good that the wife was using one of my insults… then I realized something. The phrasing of her question was very specific, "what's your multi word insult?. I keep coming up with "no talent ass clown", but that's not it, it's the other one." The other one? So this means that I only have two insults in my repertoire? This can't be true. I'm wittier than this, aren't i? I know I'm not as funny/witty as I think I am, but still, I should have more than two go-to insults, right? Both of these phrases come from movies too, which means I wasn't even good enough to come up with them on my own. This is a cause for some great introspection. Maybe I've just gotten lazy in my old age. Maybe the lack of people to insult in Maine has made me rely on my oldies but goodies. This is completely unacceptable. I need to get back on my game.

Tried a new beer. Geary's Summer Ale. For some reason whenever I go to the beer store I forget that I don't like any of the Geary's beers, yet I keep trying them thinking I'll like it this time. It's not terribly bad, but I wouldn't exactly recommend it to a friend either. I need to start writing down what I like/don't like and what I've tried/haven't tried.

Half Way There

Wednesday, half way to the weekend. There's nothing worse than being away from work for a bit and coming back to a million emails, a million phone messages and twice as many issues.

Before I start, a request. Anyone out there know of anyone getting rid of a set of juniors golf clubs? My mom is thinking of picking up golf and didn't want to go buy an expensive set, not knowing if she's actually going to like it or not. And the reason for the junior (kids) set? My mom is a Lilliputian. Yeah, she's like 4'11", on a good day, so a normal set of clubs would be too big for her.

So we finally just got around to watching last weeks finale's of How I Met Your Mother and The Office. The HIMYM finale was entertaining and predictable, but was still a quality episode. The Office on the other hand was fantastic. Lately, they've been making Michael too mean, but in this episode they brought him back to his socially awkward best. When he's mean and a jerk, the show has a different feel to it, its really not as good. But when he's fumbling and bumbling, it's perfection.

For those of you not watching, you're really missing out. Fantastic win by the Celtics last night, who could have very easily rolled over. Great team effort with solid defense and good shooting. Still a few too many jump shots for my liking, but that's just the way this team is.

I find that when I'm not in Maine, I miss it. Not sure if I miss the state, or just miss my house and my own space. It's really great seeing everyone when we're down in MA, but it's also nice to be home. My parents couch is surprisingly comfortable and all, but.... its not my bed.

The first visitors of the summer have been booked! My parents have decided to come up again in July. So now the wife and I have a target date to get everything done around the house.

And on a related note, a groundbreaking accord was struck early today by the Morrisseys. Yes, the wife and I agreed on who will be running the show on a couple of big projects that are coming up. So this weekend, I'll be doing the majority of work on the bathroom, and she gets complete carte blanche on the landscaping around the house. For either of us to concede power is a big deal, but for the wife to concede is absolutely amazing. We had this discussion while walking around Lowe's tonight, and I seriously expected an monkey to come flying out of her arse. That's how rare of an event it was.

ABC has a new show this summer called Wipeout and it looks fantastic. If you haven't seen it, there's a Japanese game show called Most Extreme Elimination Challenge (the Americanized name) and its absolutely hysterical. It involves people running a very unusual obstacle course, bouncing off things, landing in muddy water.. good stuff. No one actually ever gets hurt, but its really amazing that they don't. People just aren't supposed to bounce like they do on the show, but they somehow do. Can't wait for the show.

T-minus four days until my first batch of beer will be ready to drink. I'm going to try a bottle Saturday night and let everyone know Sunday that I didn't die and it's safe to drink. As you can tell, I have an enormous amount of faith in my brewing abilities. The beer ended up coming out at about 10%abv, which is quite a lot for a beer. Essentially one of my beers is equal to two of any other beer. In alcohol content at least.

Its the wife's turn to pick our Friday night movie. Anyone out there that wants to help me convince her to sacrifice her pick and go see Indiana Jones, please do. I neeeeed to see this movie and there's really nothing else out there that she wants to see anyway....

Weekend Goings Ons

So lets see..
It's been an eventful weekend, but nothing all that exciting all at the same time. Friday we made the trip down south to attend the Brimfield Fair Saturday. Friday night was game six of the Celtics series, so the wife and I headed over to a friends house to watch the game (more so me than her. she's just there for the finger food and company). I really don't want to talk about the game, so I won't. But I will say that it was great hanging out and seeing some friends we haven't seen in a while.

Saturday was spent at the Brimfield Fair walking aimlessly through aisles and aisles of other people's overpriced junk. We saw something we wanted to buy, but 2 hours later when we came back to it, it was gone. We did however, procure some of the best kettle corn you'll ever have and an excellent sandwich (the pilgrim, fresh turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce and mayo. perfection).

Saturday night was spent at a graduation get together for a friend who just finished grad school. Congrats Mike, you've now lapped me twice. At the party though, everyone brought their new babies so it was great to see them as we haven't seen them in months. It's really amazing how big they've gotten and how much they look like their parents. Its funny how things change though, three years ago we would have all hung out to the wee hours of the night, now with marriage and babies, we're home by 9 haha.

Sunday was spent on the golf course with dad, where we played nine holes (there was only two of us, no one else was available to play). I did, however, shoot a (for me) fantastic 44. Yep, I would have broke 90 for the first time ever! If I could have putted a little better I could have really knocked that score down some.

After a quick shopping trip with the wife, we headed over to Gramma's for a quick hello before hitting the road home. It's always great to see Gramma and Papa, but I'm pretty sure they get more excited to see the wife then they do to see me. But that's ok, cuz she's a lot more interesting than I am...