This place is just too weird for me

I need to move back to a more civilized location... I am sitting in the house working when a pickup truck pulls into my driveway. And a strange man gets out and walks up the driveway to the backdoor calling "Hello?" So I go to the backdoor (I have a front door that you bypassed, backdoor is not for strangers!)- where we have two large boxes stacked from the new chairs we bought, along with a pile of outdoor furniture cushions. This guy starts into his whole long song and dance about what he's doing there... but it basically boils down to: He is trying to sell me discount steak out of the back of his truck!!!! Door-to-door meat salesman? He'd even throw in free chicken and burgers.... uh huh... He stopped, he says, because he saw our grill- on the backporch, through my car, at the top of the driveway. Was he using binoculars??
Thankfully, I manage to get out of this gracefully by saying 'I'm sorry I can't buy anything without checking with my husband first and he's at work." At which point the strange man calls me "sweetie" and departs. I believe this excuse was less believalble then when I used it on the door-to-door driveway repairman that was "just in the neighborhood" last summer but no matter.
This has not amused me as much as the sign I saw yesterday to pre-order piglets as they will be arriving May 10th. Apparently, they want to avoid the rush that must come around pig purchasing time....